Silly old fakers trumpet bogus concert!

It seems it doesn't take a lot to get senior members of the Bypass Independents leaping up and down with glee.
Have they finally secured agreement for a multi-million pound road scheme that will end the traffic chaos that has blighted Boston for years once and for all?
No.
Have they found a way to fill our empty shops with thriving niche businesses that will make Boston a dream town for residents and a magnet for visitors?
No.
Is a solution in sight to rid the town of the litter that billows along our roads and streets like tumbleweed in a wild west ghost town?
No!
Well, what has prompted senior councillors such as Ramonde Newell to announce "this could be the start of something big," and Jim Blaylock to proclaim the event as good news for the people of Boston.
It's a ... music festival.
Not just any old music festival, a gathering of fake bands - or to put it in Borough Councilspeak, "a festival of top-class tribute bands" in Central Park on the August bank holiday weekend.
No one seems to consider it in the least ironic that the best the Cabinet can do is to latch on to the bandwagon of something that has as its main selling point the fact that it is fake.
Bogus big name performers such as The Fillers (The Killers,) the ANTarctic Monkeys, Kings of Lyon (Leon) Stereotonics (Stereophonics,) Blondied, Guns 2 Roses, New2 (U2), Really Hot Chilli Peppers, and the Four (Foo) Fighters could be among the bands to appear.
Reaction from the Boston Standard, where they seem to regard any combination of music and alcohol as the equivalent of Live Aid all over again, is to imply that this is an act of generosity by a private firm to "cure our summertime blues following the demise of the Party in the Park."
In fact it's no such thing, It's a money making commercial exercise run by a firm that specialises in bringing such events to small towns around the country - mostly in the Nottinghamshire, Lincolnshire and Humberside areas.
The company rides into town on Friday, sets up, runs the concert on Saturday, and disappears on Sunday, guaranteeing to leave everywhere neat and tidy afterwards.
Another councillor on the gung-ho bandwagon, cultural services portfolio holder Richard Dungworth, said the show would bring a music event into the heart of the community allowing local people to enjoy a fun day out.
Again, the impression is of a mini Party in the Park, but this is a paid for event for no more than 1,000 people staged in an enclosed marquee in a fenced off area containing the company's own catering service providing food and booze. Lager, bitter, Magners cider red, rose and white wine, WKD Blue, Smirnoff Ice, Vodka, Bacardi, and Jack Daniels are all on the menu.
"Cultural" services manager Barrie Higham said tickets were usually pitched at between £17 and £20. Had he taken a look at the Fake Festival website, he would have seen that the bulk of the prices being charged are £15 for adults and £10 for seven to seventeen year-olds, although there is a £1.70 handling fee on top..
Whilst that's good news for our financially pressed locals, the overall news for Boston is not so good.
At it's most conservative estimate, the organisers of the Fake Festival will go home with around £15,000 in ticket money that would otherwise have been spent locally. Factor in the cost of drinks vouchers at £2.50, and even if the revellers are restrained at least another £5,000 will leave town instead of being spent locally.
Whilst it's impossible to put a figure on it, we don't think it's unfair to say that the loss to Boston will have to be in the order of £30,000.
Hypocritically, the BBI will have to rescind its by-law that prohibits consumption of alcohol in the park - but we wouldn't like to be found outside the fence clutching a tinnie, as we're sure that will remain illegal.
Don't think that we are against events like these.
We just think that the council has over-gilded this particular lily, and haven't properly considered the impact on the local economy.
Not only that, Councillor Newell is quoted as saying he thinks this event could be staged on a regular basis. Just imagine, four such concerts a year could leave the local economy more than £100,000 out of pocket.
The other irony that amuses us is the comparison with the now defunct Party in the Party. Whilst quick to point out that the previous administration is usually to blame for everything, the BBI has given no credit to the old administration for coming up with the idea in the first place.
Although it had passed its sell-by date by the time the BBI put it out of its misery, it was not before our new rulers failed to notice that the event lacked cancellation insurance when it was called off due to bad weather - costing the taxpayers a fortune - that it finally died the death.

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